Hi Pauline,

As my mothers health deteriated due to her breast cancer,One of our local hospice's used to pick her up once a week where she and others would play games ect. I never thought my mother would participate as she was a very independant lady but she used to enjoy herself. There was one occasion where the hospital couldnt sort out her pain relief so the hospice took her in for a few day and soon had it under control. I was very impressed with the care they showed her.

Take care brave lady,sending kind thoughts and best wishes your way, Brian.

Thank you, Brian.  I remember when I first came on this forum you were the first person to welcome me.

Like your mum, I used to be very independent but I have learnt in the last year that I need people and I will join in things to keep myself occupied and enjoy the companionship.

I am trying to be brave, Brian, but I do have meltdowns because I feel so out of control, but I guess we all feel like that at times.

Take care.

Hi Pauline

I just read your post and really felt for you. It must be very difficult for an independant woman to accept some help but it looks like the hospice nurse has offered you some good practical help and some positive and enjoyable things to do. The hospice nurses really are in a class of their own. Im sure you will be well looked after. best wishes Kim

What an emotional post -  although I have secondary breast cancer, I am not as far down the road as you yet.   It must have really difficult to have this visit today and you are amazing in how you have handled it.  It's good to know that you will have such great people looking after you and you have some fun activities arranged.  I am thinking of you and sending you lots of love xxxxx

Hi Pauline .... I am so pleased to hear that you are now in the 'helping hands' of the hospice team.  Sadly we do not have a hospice in our area and it must be a comfort to meet those people who will help you and your family, and be able to support you with your pain relief etc.  Also to forge new friendships with others in a similar situation to yourself.

Due to the lack of facilities in our area, I am under the care of the local palliative care team who hopefully will manage my care at home if appropriate.  It has been a Godsend to have their help with pain relief, financial information, etc.   I am sure you will also appreciate the fact that you have people you can now turn to - it has been a long time coming for you!

Pauline, there are several of us here in the same boat and I hope we can continue to support each other when needed.  All the best to you my forum friend x

Hi Pauline,

Glad you are now getting the care that you deserve, the hospice movement and their incredible staff seem to all provide a service that no hospital  can match. As you say the holistic approach taking care of not only the medical but the spiritual, financial and practical side allows you  to approach the future without as much concern. 

Gills biggest worry was the pain, but I can say that at no stage did  she ever suffer more than moderate discomfort. Initially her  pain was controlled  by palliative care nurse and GP with the help of the wonderful community nurses, but as soon as sign of anything worse a few days in the hospice and it was sorted.

I hope you continue to get good support now you are in contact with your hospice, you deserve it. No one should have to face this awful thing alone and in fear.

Keep strong and love and best wishes 

Deggsy

Hi Pauline

At such difficult times, but with practicality in mind, how brave you are and I think you should be so proud of yourself for making your mind up in how you would liked to be cared for as your illness progresses. Although my husband did not use the hospice route my best friend did and found their help and caring attitude a huge bonus (her words).  She too attended the art therapy and many other 'day out' visits and had her pain relief well monitored both whilst at home and during the odd week's holiday as she put it. Though she had husband and son at home she felt more in control of her own wishes/care and I visited her when she was in the hospice and she was totally relaxed in those surroundings.  Just a whole different atmosphere to a general hospital ward.

Sending you huge hugs and I can almost hear the relief in  your post now that the first step  in asking for help has been taken.

I am staying with friends for the weekend so will be without technology (refuse to take a laptop as part of my luggage ha ha) but hope to catch up with you soon.  Take care  Jules xx

Pauline, what a marvellous response you've had on here, see how many people love you!  Like them, I am pleased as punch that the hospice is being so helpful, and that you can find some peace at long last after so much worry and pain.

Like Brian says, you are one strong, brave lady!

Hazel xxx

PS Have also replied on Private Messaging. 

I just want to say a huge thanks for all your replies.  This forum has kept me sane for such a long while and the amazing people are always there to help with everything.

I do have family and lots of friends but when you live alone there is a lot of time when you need someone to talk to - and you are always there.

This is not a journey any one of us want to take but thank you all for being by my side along the way. x

I'm sure they have computers in the hospice too

You better post and let us know how you're getting on or we'll be round there to bust you out ! ;)