Dear all, the NHS have a lot to answer for, Norman now has covid, despite no visiting and being in a side room he has it, two years I've kept him safe, it's taken them two weeks to turn him into a wreck. Tuesday gone, in my mind having seen a senior doctor we were all set to put it all in place, but no, they then ask Norman today what he wants, millions of questions, do you want this, do you want that and he is obviously very muddled and he said no to certain things. we were waiting for a nursing home bed, but no, they meet me at the ward doors when I took clean clothes in and tell me he will be home Tuesday next week, with a care package but no grab rails, no bidet, no raised toilet seats because apparently my sick husband said he didn't want them! I'm so bloody mad and asked why when we had a meeting it all changed, because he is the patient. Do you know what I had to do, call Norman on his phone from six feet away whilst the staff nurse stood next to him and bellow down the phone to just say yes to everything, even if they asked him about a wheelchair, we've got two already but if they ask you I said just say yes. So I arrive home and despite everyone having my mobile, continuing health care had left a message on my house phone, they must go home early because no one called me back. Then a phone call from Dr W, who I thought was calling about what was happening and relayed all my rants at him until it suddenly dawned on me he was the blood consultant, I'd actually rang and cancelled this phone call as Norman wasnt here, so more resources wasted. I had also spent ages cancelling our DWP care allowance as he wasn't here and was going into a nursing home, I now have to call them back and alter it all again. I wish to God we had kept him safe at home and just let him fade away peacefully in his own bed. If I don't have a heart attack it will be a miracle. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Love Carol x
Christine, who would think things could get worse, but they have. I got up and couldn't see out of my left eye, I haven't had migraine for years but I have now. I waited until it settled, rang Noman, the hospital is in lockdown but a doctor told him he's being moved to Bishop onto a coronavirus ward, no one told me. So we discussed an upholstered chair for our kitchen and off I went to have a look, all very helpful and will bring out to the house the one I chose to ensure that it's OK. Got some food, picked up his prescription drove home, got in the house, went out for the shopping and the door blew shut on me. It's freezing here the frost has not lifted all day, so off I went to Maureen's after ringing a locksmith, Tilly the dog was so happy to see me but was eating sardines and biscuits (to lubricate her joints) she jumps up on my lap, knocks my tea all over me then promptly licks it off so I now stink of sardines! The bloke came, got me in the house and suggested a key box for outside, good idea I say, so all together it's cost me £160, plus £500 for the chair, I will be back onto the DWP ASAP when Norman gets home to get his money reinstated. The commode person has just rang, so that's coming Monday, still waiting for Luke to help me, Ask for help everyone says, then you never see them. Just had another text from NHS test and trace saying I've not logged on, threatening to call me, go ahead, as the gunman said in some cowboy film and see what happens, the NHS gave him covid, they can report it!! Take care all, love Carol x
I know it doesn't feel like it now but one day, I'm sure you will tell that story about the lockout and Tilly with the sardines and laugh about it.
Those test and trace people are unbelievable! My daughter was very rude to her test and trace callers when she had Covid. She would be trying to sleep after a horrible night and they would call every single day to tell her she must not go out. She ended up shouting "I'm too ******* ill to go anywhere - stop calling!"
Hang in there, Carol, it is going to get worse before it gets better and we all know that it isn't going to end well, but there will be an end and you must make sure you are taking care of your own health so you don't fall to pieces when it does. I recommend whatever it takes to get you a good night's sleep, and don't forget to eat!
lots of love
Dear carol I think Christine said it all alot better than i could ,. just remember there's plenty of people on the forum are thinking of you and your Norman . But like me not sure what to say .
Take care keep safe especially of sardines , hope you are eating well .. hope you get all the things you need for Norman and yourself soon .
Love Billy xxxx
Thanks you two, I've just had my nephew move the whole bedroom around so Norman can move better with the carers. I've had a takeaway Curry and rice large gin and tonic and I feel a lot more relaxed. Thank you all for your support and love sent my way. Let's see where we're up to tomorrow and whether Norman stays where he is.
What a horrible time you are having Carol. It seems to be a sign of the times that you can't get things done these days without making a fuss which shouldn't be the case - standards have definitely dropped - sending love and hugs and hope that things will improve for you soon!
Norman has stayed put and there is no sign that he is moving. A guy from Durham community hub rang me about his covid test, can I speak to Norman he asks, I had ignored 7 text messages since yesterday and I explained that he was in hospital with covid, oh dear he says when did he go in with covid, he didn't, he went in for something else and caught covid, what about you he asks, are you isolating, no because I'm not allowed to see him!! I tell you what I'll take you off the register so you get no more texts, thank you so much and for once someone has done what they said as my phone has been silent. Its Ella's 9th birthday today, she facetimed me and showed me all her presents and what she had done, friends to play, off to pizza express, film at home and now a chicken curry for tea. I've been and bought a standard lamp, moved the dining table sideways, put two dining chairs in the overcrowded garage and we have a lot more room for his armchair, when he gets home. I'm now looking for a non slip step to put outside our front door as Norman is still of the opinion that he will manage to get out, I'm not telling him otherwise but these plastic steps are nearly £100.ans it's a rip off, if it's classed as disabled it's double the price of anything else. Just had tea and a large gin so feel more calm, feet up and see if there's anything interesting on the TV. Take care all of you, your kindness is much appreciated and brightens my day. Carol xx
Dear carol, you can get a non slip half step 4 in high at £ 40 , or a wider one with handrails either side for 140 form careco,we get plenty from them vat free if it's for disabled.
Glad you are getting things aranged before hand. And glad you are still eating ok and"drinking" .
Take care my dear friend.
Love Billy xxxx
Thanks Billy I'll have another look tomorrow I've had enough tonight. It's not really the money side of it but I'm concerned Norman won't be able to get around on two legs again. Thank you dear friend for your kindness Love Carol
Morning carol dear friend . Didn't think yesterday, but would Norman be better with a ramp,you can get them with handrails if you have the room near your door.
Would Norman manage a walking frame or stroller with his leg ,. hope you don't think im pushing you into decisions .
i went into all this with Brenda years ago and took ages to find best options, even now still finding better ideas and new things come out regularly.
Thinking of you and Norman and hoping you can soon be together again .
Love Billy xxxx
Thanks Billy I really appreciate you trying to help me. I've had everything you've suggested over the past 13 years since Norman had his leg amputated. But he is now very weak and in his mind thinks he will be able to walk so a step will be easier than a ramp to walk on. I'm having a lie in this morning which I never do freezing cold it's not a lot to get up for. Love to you both. Carol. Xx
Hi everyone, to say the last few days have been stressful is an understatement. Monday morning occupational therapy rang and said they would send a commode only, I was so mad that I told them if we didn't have everything in place I wouldn't accept Norman home. By dinner time I had two toilet frames two seats a commode all delivered by different people, in between this I was taken so many phone calls I ended up with an ulcer on my tongue! I spoke to Norman who said he had been told that the Covid had made his condition worse, how wortse we have no idea. I crawled into bed Monday night exhausted, had a good nights sleep and then it all started again yesterday morning. A phone call from Ward 51, I don't know who you are I said , we've got your husband he was moved last night and will be sent home this afternoon. I still have no care in place hadn't seen anybody medical to help me and then they ring me again and say because he has Covid he will be isolated in his bedroom for five days when he comes home . This was the straw that broke the camels back and I rang my surgery. Who thinks you can send a terminally ill man home and lock him in a room for five days, leaving food outside the door. So as usual this information was completely false and because I was not going anywhere we needed to do nothing. The carers didn't come in till 9 pm, Poor Norman had been dropped off by an ambulance with a bag of dirty washing and a bag of medicine, no instructions no help and no knowledge of what was happening . My poor husband was sent home looking like they had picked him up from the gutter, he hasn't had a wash or a shave for three weeks, he absolutely honked and I could've broken down in tears when I saw him. He was so happy to be home, loved his new chair, loved me, loved his family, loved being home and would never, never go back into hospital. The carers with him bathed him and put clean clothes on him and we put him to bed. In between all of this the oxygen machine was delivered but they only sent one, so we had to Trail the cable down the stairs and across the kitchen floor, meaning I'm having to climb over oxygen tubes and under them upstairs. I'll tell you tomorrow about everything else that has gone wrong since and once again thank you all for being there. Love Carol