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Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 15:58

I have a busy day and come home to my lovely neighbour mowing my back lawn.  I chastise him and say  I would have got round to it, he knew I was struggling and came in whilst I was out.  These kindnesses make my day.  I think hubby is not looking well and voice my concerns.   Nope he says he's fine but a little niggle tells me otherwise.   I get up this morning and he admits he's not good..  appointment at Doctors and he has another infection.  I am being picked up by a friend to go to Wynyard Hall and gardens, the day is glorious and she has the soft top down,we arrive and I look like Bridget Jones after her ride in an open top car!  We have home made cake and coffee and meander the beautiful gardens looking at the pumpkins, sweetcorn and variety of flowers.  I suddenly spot a flower that hubby and I keep seeing  on our drives and it's driving him insane not knowing its name.  A lady hears us talking, takes a photo, Googles it and walks back to tell me, it's  called the common tansy. People are so thoughtful and kind!  Back home hubby laughs at the state of my hair, saying I look like I have been pulled through a hedge backwards,  charming!!  I tell him the plants name, lovely he says and promptly falls asleep on his sheepskin in the sunny conservatory.   Hopefully the antibiotics will kick in soon, I want my normal hubby back.

Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 18:18 in response to Dor06
Hi Caz Please don't take this the wrong way but why are you starting a new post everyday. Why not update us on the same thread. Good friends and neighbors are such a strength during this journey.

Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 20:24 in response to river56

Probably because I don't know how!  Give me a clue what to do. Caz

Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 20:54 in response to Dor06

Hi Carol,

Sorry to cut in the conversation but I thought I might be able to help if you're having difficulties when replying on the same thread. 

In order to post on the same thread you started, all you need to do is to click on the pink 'reply' button on the right corner of your message. That will create a new post within the thread, for example, if you want to post another message here, you'd click on the button I circled below and then on 'post now':

 

But if you are still having difficulties,  just click here and send us an email, we'll be happy to try to assist you. Happy

Best wishes,

Renata, Cancer Chat Moderator

 

Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 22:09 in response to Moderator Renata

Thanks for that. . I will try it tomorrow.   Carol

Stay Strong

18 Aug 2017 00:17 in response to Dor06

Learn something new every day. If you click on the reply button to this post that will give you a start.

Stay Strong

18 Aug 2017 13:11 in response to river56

So I now know how to use the followed threads!  Pity no one told me weeks ago!!  Anyway the infection is taking its toll and hubby is not on the same planet as me!  We get in the car and his walking stick has gone missing from the four foot from front door to car door.  What have you done with it, me I didn't have it, backs to specs situation again.  We both look around the car, no sign, climb back out and lo and behold it's on the top of the hedge nestling safely in the pretty pink flowers!   Back home, handed key for front door, don't need it because he hasn't locked it, fortunately we have not been burgled!!  I'll take you to town he says but I can see my life flashing before me and decline the offer. Let's wait until the antibiotics kick in. We stay safely in the house and he sleeps the afternoon away.  

Stay Strong

19 Aug 2017 16:20 in response to Dor06

Hubby is not doing well with this infection and is not up to much or interested in anything.  My best friend has gone to Tenerife and we hug before she goes, she has been my rock over the last five months and I shall miss her dearly.  My younger daughter calls, she, son in law and my Harry are off to Greece for their hols and she promises that when Dad is better they want to send us a way for a break.   I don't tell her he has another infection,  spoiling her happiness would be mean.  I wish them all a lovely time,  they have busy lives and deserve the break.   We have no choice but to stay put  and it is hard.  Anyway hubby decided he would get the hospital transport for his radiotherapy,   I say a little prayer of thanks, I think four weeks of his criticism of my driving might be the straw that broke the camel's back!! Curry for tea and some chilled wine, I will miss the Spanish thriller I have watched for the past four weeks! !

 

Stay Strong

19 Aug 2017 17:10 in response to Dor06
I know your life is on hold during treatment you can't plan ahead. I remember going to the local coop with husband he put the shopping on the checkout then just as the girl was about to start he noticed she had a cold. He put everything back in the trolley apologize saying sorry my wife is having chemo and has to stay away from people with colds. Went to another person I didn't know wether to hide or hug him. As to the Spanish thriller can't you record it or watch it on catch up. Sending this from Austria lucky me here for a week.

Stay Strong

19 Aug 2017 17:56 in response to river56

Have a great time in  Austria , your hubby sounds great, I haven't seen anyone if they are ill! Spanish thriller finished last week,  will miss suspense until next series!  Carol

Stay Strong

20 Aug 2017 16:34 in response to Dor06

I am sat watching rubbish TV for a Saturday night and feeling sorry for myself when the phone rings and it's my older daughter saying can they come and stay before Dad starts radiotherapy.   Yes I say, it would be lovely to have other people here to cheer him up, especially our four year old granddaughter who is a bundle of mischief.   So more food and preparation ready for them arriving.  I have been  neglecting the house because hubby is in it so much!   He hates me hoovering around him and dusting under his nose, it's only when others are coming, you see the floating seeds that attach themselves to everything at this time of the year,  the cobwebs because we live near fields, and the dust from the now dry roads after all the rain.  So my hubby and I are looking forward to having some laughter and fun before the toll of the radiotherapy takes effect. 

Stay Strong

21 Aug 2017 16:32 in response to Dor06

I have been up since 8 am and have just sat down as I write this post,  I must have done the recommended steps today, daughter, grandson and granddaughter arriving tomorrow,  washing done, bathrooms cleaned, lawn mowed, shopping for food and window cleaner been as they were filthy after the roofers had been!!  I have made hubby go out for some fresh air as he has been nowhere for days, I know he is feeling rubbish and is worried about Thursday and radiotherapy but sometimes you get stuck in a rut and need a shove, so I have shoved him!  He is coughing more but it's difficult to know whether it's the cancer or the antibiotics drying his system up.  We don't even know if the tumour has shrunk  more, sInce the end of chemo we seem to have fallen off the radar.  Is that normal I ask myself or are we expecting too much from the NHS?  I am still angry that we had this cough checked out last September and despite all the television and radio adverts telling you to report a persistent cough it took six months before our surgery twigged that it was serious.  What is the point of knowledge if your GP ignores the rules?  I am drinking chilled wine whilst typing this, it is my treat at the end of a busy day,  but it has been worth it if the family cheer him up.  

Stay Strong

22 Aug 2017 11:59 in response to Dor06

Well hubby is not in a a good mood and he is determined to try and spoil my joy at everyone coming and I know that when they arrive he will be happy go lucky!   He has wound me up to such an extent that everything I planned to do has been left because my mind is concentrating on him.  I know he is scared about Thursday and I understand that, it must be terrifying knowing what is coming.  So hopefully they will be here soon and take the onus off me so that I can share the burden with someone else for a change!  I have bought lots of things for the children to do, little handbag from the charity shop for ELLA and a minecraft sticker book for Alfie, some new tennis balls and bat so they can whack them over the eight foot hedge, thank goodness for Boyes, it's so cheap I don't mind them losing them.  Wish me a lovely time!!.   

Stay Strong

24 Aug 2017 10:44 in response to Dor06

Well the family arrive and hubby instantly brightens up.  We decide not to disturb our sleeping arrangements and get the old cot mattress out for Ella and the black and white cow blanket as it has now been named and put it on the floor by my bed,  this means I am awoken at 5.45 am by a little one needing a wee!  She won't back to sleep so I end up downloadin bbc I player for kids so we don't wake the whole house up.  Mummy gets a lie in and by nine O'clock I have already done three hours of playing, feeding and stopping her arguing with her Brother over who has whose I pad!    We take off for the indoor play park with hubby in tow but the weather is terrible so everyone has had the same idea.  Hubby is looking in pain so we all load back into the car and go home for tea and cake! He is now getting worried about today and fears what's to come, so we are staying close today to be there for him when he comes back.  I'll let you know how it goes.

Stay Strong

24 Aug 2017 14:50 in response to Dor06
That maybe why he has not been in a good mood worrying about tomorrow. I thought I was handling everything but my husband said I went very quiet and a bit short tempered before my appointments. He says I still go quiet and cleaning mad just before my 3 monthly check up. Enjoy the family visit.

Stay Strong

24 Aug 2017 19:36 in response to river56

It must be terrifying knowing what is coming but not really knowing.  I admire all of you going through the trauma I know I would go quiet and clean like mad as it's a coping mechanism.  Thank you for the helpful comments.   Carol

Stay Strong

25 Aug 2017 21:13 in response to Dor06

We sit around all morning waiting for patient transport,  the tension is high and hubby says I just want it over and done with. Daughter and I try to calm him down but it's difficult,  transport arrives two hours later and we all wave him off as if he's going to war, which I suppose it is,  his own battle with cancer.  I stay home not knowing when he is coming back whilst the children go to the park.  He arrives home at 5 pm full of all that has happened,  it's a doddle, nothing to worry about, the machine has a picture of lovely woods and scenery so he can watch that,  all I have to do is moisturis him with cream.  The grandchildren are fascinated by Grandma rubbing cream into Grandad and spot his hairy chest!  As for myself,  it's a long time since I rubbed cream on him!!  We all seem more settled and Ella asks if they can stay longer, yes says Mummy, happiness all round!!

Stay Strong

26 Aug 2017 11:41 in response to Dor06

It's a beautiful day but we are stuck at home playing tea parties because today I have to take hubby for radiotherapy due to transport not being available on a Saturday!   Of course the time is bang in the middle of the day so everything is put on hold.  I promise the two children I will take them to the trampoline park to work off some energy.  We went to see the Nut Job yesterday (movie)  and giggle all the way through apart from the scary bit where I end up with a chocolate covered four year old on my knee because the little  girl was pulling heads off dollies! !  Off to Bella Italian,  where the grandson goes into teenager ,mode because he wants to go to  Pizza  Express, so he and Mummy have cross words!!  Anyway we arrive home late and I find a starving hubby trying to cook his own tea, we all feel guilty for neglecting him!! Fed and watered,  daughter and I settle down with a chilled glass of wine and Coronation Street.

Stay Strong

27 Aug 2017 14:13 in response to Dor06

My last 6.00 am start and our little grandaughter doing her meerkat impression from my side of the bed, whispering,  Grandma are you awake!  Even hubby drags himselg out of bed to say goodbye,  I think he had forgotten that there are still two 7 o'clocks in a day.  We wave goodbye and the house is suddenly very quiet, we look at each other with a mixture of relief and dismay, they have gone.  8 am my mobile pings, I have fraudulent activity on our bank account.   I don't trust the number given, I ring them direct, no I have not spent this money, eventually We find out its I Tunes, the penny drops, dash downstairs to hubby, yes he authorised £1.58, that has turned into £40.00!!  Lesson learned, never give a nine year old your password! !  We decide to put it down to experience and blame hubby's lack of brain power due to radiotherapy.   Only seventeen sessions to go.  Feet up and little nap for both of us methinks.  Hope you are all Staying Strong. Xx

Stay Strong

27 Aug 2017 17:27 in response to river56

Hi to you, we have had a great time with the family,  it is so nice to have some fun! I hope you are doing ok. X

Stay Strong

27 Aug 2017 19:24 in response to Dor06

Hi Caz glad your hubbys treatment is going ok and you had a good time with the family. We arrived home Saturday so have been washing today. Had a great time went on 3 bike rides and a couple of short walks. Not bad considering just over 2 years ago I just finished chemo and radiotherapy. It's not an easy going through treatment and I'm sure its not easy for the partner. I told my husband " sorry love but this is the sickness and worse bit and if I get through then we are going all out on the better things". Which we are. X

Stay Strong

27 Aug 2017 22:13 in response to river56

So pleased you enjoyed yourself and that things are looking brighter.   My hubby said that he didn't think that I had signed up for this, I said I remember in sickness and health but hadn't banked on this much sickness! !  It's good that we can keep a perspective in between all the travails sent our way.   keep in touch.   Caz

Stay Strong

28 Aug 2017 15:38 in response to Dor06

It's a quarter to ten and hubby is still in bed, I go in and tell him if he doesn't get up I will jump all over him shouting Grandad get up and put your leg on!  This works and he drags himself out from under  the covers,  he is sad that he only has me left to talk to again after all the chat of the last six days.  Me I'm off to do some retail therapy, spending , it certainly takes my mind  off the boring day ahead!  I pop into M & S and treat us to some different food, moussaka,  cauliflower cheese, little summer fruit puddings and steaks and mashed potato for dinner tomorrow.   I am running out of ideas to tempt him to keep eating and think this will help, well I did until I arrive home to be advised that he now has an upset stomach and thinks it was the curry I made everyone, great another problem to deal with.  I give up.  Glass of wine, rhubarb shortbread biscuits and feet up, he can sleep it off on the sheepskin chair!   See you tomorrow. 

Stay Strong

29 Aug 2017 15:26 in response to Dor06

I get up early to do a fitness class when hubby asks me to go to the opticians with him because our Grandson gave him a massive hug and snapped them off at the arm!  He thinks my days are run around his timetable (which they normally are)and I stand my ground and tell him to go himself, see what he likes and I will come in my sweaty Betty gym kit afterwards.   This plan is accepted and I duly meet him later.  Chosen some new specs,  I agree with his choice, half price offer on so we all agree to go ahead.  Problem, his eyes might change until treatment is over so recommend we leave it til then!!  The old ones are fixed and the optician takes pity on us, puts the frames away and promises to keep the offer until we go back.  It is so thoughtful of people who do  not know you but help anyway when you mention cancer.   I don't think in the last six months that we have had one negative response when we explain our situation.  Back home, ambulance collects him and another countdown on the radiotherapy.   The ambulance service calls whilst he is out asking if a car will be OK tomorrow,  yes I say,  is that his daughter they ask,  no wife, oh you sound very young, I do try! !

Stay Strong

30 Aug 2017 18:05 in response to Dor06

Well I baste hubby like a Christmas turkey but have not used plain vaseline cream and he is on fire!  We have to go upstairs where we position him on a mat and wash him down.  No flannels or sponges allowed, no scrubbing just hands and soap, but now I have cold hands he moans making him shiver.  Crikey I am losing patience with the constant having to see to him no matter what I may be doing myself!!   Still only fifteen sessions left.  He then tells me that having seen himself in the three way mirrors at the hospital he is going on a diet, plus the fact his beloved grandaughter has told him he not only has a fat tummy but a fat bum! !  Glad I missed out on those observations! !  I tell him he needs to concentrate on getting better first, this is accepted and he eats all his tea (plus fruit loaf later when he thinks I'm not looking ).  Fourteen sessions to go.

Stay Strong

31 Aug 2017 14:47 in response to Dor06

Todayis a quiet day.  Chatting to neighbours in the sunshine,  hubby won't come out, he is becoming a little unsociable.   His mind is always on getting better,  getting through the treatments and coming out the other end with good results.   He has a review today so I am anxiously awaiting his return home.  I bump into my friend opposite and she is hanging out the flags as her daughter and fiance are moving to a new home today and she is getting her home back.  She has only been in this house a couple of years,  she left her hubby when the dog died and she realised she had no one to talk to anymore! !  She makes me laugh and we have a quick natter, thank goodness for good friends.  X

Stay Strong

1 Sep 2017 18:12 in response to Dor06

I am so cross with myself,  hubby had his review and said all is going well, this gave me the confidence to finally check the statistics on cancer survival, only to find that things have not changed in the past forty years and that the survival rate for stage 4 lung cancer at his age is only one to two years from diagnosis.  Is this true?  We have already gone six months through the treatment, where does that leave us?  Do I speak to our Mc Millan nurse and ask the dreaded question that neither of us have asked since diagnosis, or do I carry on being positive for him knowing he wants to live as long as possible.  Help me in this all of you, I am lost and afraid again.

Stay Strong

1 Sep 2017 19:57 in response to Dor06

Hi Carol. It is a question we want to ask too but like you don't want to hear the answer. When he was first diagnosed the consultant told us that if he had the treatment (radiotherapy and chemotherapy) he could have up to 5 years. I feel that is best case scenario , the uncertainty is what is driving us crazy. I try to keep positive with my husband but when I am alone my mind goes into overdrive and that is when I can't cope. This vile disease has taken over our lives, we are all in the same boat I fear. 

Much love to you and yours, I haven't been any help in answering your question but I am thinking of you and hoping that you find some peace of mind. 

Chris

Stay Strong

1 Sep 2017 20:17 in response to Grandma77

Thank you Chris, I have tried so hard to stay positive and will take your five year survival rate as a goal to aim for.  I keep busy but you are right our alone moments take us to dark places.   Thinking of you and all in this daily struggle.   Csrol

Stay Strong

2 Sep 2017 11:59 in response to Dor06

Hi Caz

I find it best to try and forget about the numbers and just get through one thing at a time - like the treatment.

 

I was told 17% chance of survival but when is that calculated from. My gynaecologist counts from discovery so that's 3 years later this month. My Oncologist counts from the completion of treatment so that's 27 months. The doctor I usually see at my checkup counts from my last scan when everything was clear so that won't be 2 years until November.

I know appointments and treatment take over your life but try to carry on as normal as possible around that.

I am under Doctors orders to get on with my life go on holiday so that's exactly what I am doing. You don't know what is round the corner.

river

Stay Strong

2 Sep 2017 13:50 in response to river56

Live in the moment.

Well said river.

 

Regards

Taff

Stay Strong

2 Sep 2017 15:31 in response to river56

Hi River,  I think I am just going to do what I have been doing since diagnosis and live each day as fully as possible.   My Grandad died of lung cancer when I was expecting my first daughter and the image of his five and a half stone body in stripey pyjamas has stayed with me forever,  this was my first image when hubby was diagnosed, I couldn't bear that for him.  A holiday sounds marvellous our daughter is talking about sending us away after radiotherapy,  that would be lovely if I can persuade him to go!  Many thanks for your upbeat message.   Caz

Stay Strong

2 Sep 2017 15:32 in response to Taff

Short and to the point Taff,  my kind of man!!

Stay Strong

2 Sep 2017 15:44 in response to Dor06

Hubby is upbeat and says he is feeling good.  The chemo seems to have worn off and he is moving around a little better, he has dressed nicely, but not shaved as it is white like his hair since chemo, I have to rub my hands over his chin so he can prove his point!  It's a beautiful day so he goes to Richmond to check his golf buggy,  people have been using it with his permission friends have told him and using his petrol.  Very annoyed he states, just because it hasn't moved for many months doesn't give them the right to use it.  I get a letter from Solicitors saying I am being sued for negligence after my minor bump before chemo the other week.  Great another problem to sort out, especially when I wasn't at fault! Talk about spoiling a good day.   Stay strong all of you out there.  X

Stay Strong

2 Sep 2017 16:44 in response to Dor06

It's a gift.

Stay Strong

3 Sep 2017 16:58 in response to Taff

We sleep in late, I am exhausted after moving the lawn, cutting back shrubs and sweeping the whole lot up.  We have decided our neighbours cat Dexter is deaf!  ▪We have two cat scarers in the garden which has got rid of them all but him!!  He's  just a young gun and I'm wondering if his hearing hasn't developed fully yet, mind he seems to hear me shouting at him well enough.  Hubby is basted in vaseline with the usual my hands are cold.  Sunday Papers,  coffee and toast and he is strong enough to go for a beef baguette , roast tatties and gravy to one of our favourite village pubs.  We arrive to find an old lady asleep and tucked up with a blanket on the window seat, a little weird we both say quietly to each other! !  Turns out she's the land ladies ancient Grandma and has been brought out for a treat.  I nudge hubby and say that will be me in twenty years, when our grandkids want to go drinking but have to take me, we giggle and I tell him I'll be fine as long as they keep me supplied with vodka!  It's lovely to go out together again,  we eat and make our way home, cup of tea, fruit cake and in time for the Grand Prix, a normal day in our world of cancer.xx

Stay Strong

4 Sep 2017 15:10 in response to Dor06

Our grandaughter starts school today, they face time us to show her in her school uniform, blue and white gingham dress, matching headband and new shoes from us with red flashy sparkles in the heels for dark mornings to come.  Where has the time gone?   I can remember her Mummy starting school like it was yesterday.   Who knew all those years ago What life would throw at us.  Hubby is collected for his radiotherapy, nine sessions to go! We pray this is working so we can live a more normal life. I just sit down to have a quiet coffee and my neighbour knocks, he's come to cut the hedge, so my quiet time turns into raking the hedge cuttings up, getting a sweat on, thanking him for all his help.  What would we be without friends in this tough time, they are a blessing.   I am hoping for half hours peace before hubby returns and the moisturising starts again!

Stay Strong

5 Sep 2017 15:58 in response to Dor06

Well my half hour peace lasted until 5 pm by which time hubby still hadn't arrived home.  I call James Cook hospital and it is so late there is no one there.    I wouldn't normally panic but this cancer scares me to think the worst.  He finally turns up saying they had forgotten to put him on the first pick up so he had to wait,  I tell him to take his phone next time to save me worrying! !  He is coping well and there is no sign of any burning,  that's probably because I baste him like an oven ready chicken each day.  Our younger daughter calls,  she is safely back from Greece and has handed her notice in at work, final interview today for a job they interviewed her for on holiday, I ask if she wore her bikini for the first one!   She is beautifully endowed I say, no wonder she is in the final few.   Anyway they' re coming for their 12th wedding anniversary in 10 days time and we are really looking for to seeing them.  Sunday lunch out is on the cards and a few drinks!!  Hope you are all staying strong. Xx

 

Stay Strong

6 Sep 2017 14:11 in response to Dor06

Hubby is now suffering acid reflux ad the tumour is blocking his windpipe so they are targeting that area, he is coping so well that I keep having to remind myself the severity of the tumour.  I fear I am becoming a little too used to this feeling of everything will be OK and that the rug will be pulled from under our feet again.  Everything else slides off my back like water off a duck.  Car crashes,  people trying to sue me, people reversing into me and not leaving notes at the hospital, all these trials and tribulations are nothing compared to this fight with cancer.   I have to go now as my car is in for repairs again!  Another £75.00  we'll never see again.  Take care all of you out there, we are all fight for the same thing.  Caz

Stay Strong

7 Sep 2017 15:23 in response to Dor06

Our neighbour comes in to borrow our long secateurs, go and say hi I say as I am just off to the chemists for hubby, it will do him good to have a man natter!  Back home he tells me that our neighbour is glad to see him looking so well, he is right, apart from the hair loss he is now looking more like his old self (less of the old he says).  His skin is in the best condition than it has been for a long while, we decide to carry on basting even when he doesn't need it.  His moustache is getting some colour back and he now has  badgers streak on his head!!  It would be lovely to think that we are entering the last phase of this black disease, we know it's not curable only treatable but we have always hoped for the best outcome, I Pray this will be the prognosis at the end, 7 courses to go!!

Stay Strong

8 Sep 2017 16:20 in response to Dor06

Hubby calls me from the hospital he needs a review and as he has the begining of a sore throat he wants to see the person involved.  He calls me again he had waited one and a half hours, missed his lift and still hadn't been  seen.  He calls again at 6pm he is on his way home.  So for a ten minute treatment and a two minute review he had been gone over five hours.  We are both starving when he gets home so I go for fish and chips.  We wolf them down, have a cup of tea and he tells me about the review.  How are you?  Fine he says slight sore throat but nothing to complain about, well there will be he is told and a prescription is ordered.  Talk about being upbeat on the professional side!! Why do some of these professionals have no bedside manner?   This takes us back to the diagnosis when the Dr.  Asks us what we think is wrong.  Smiling whilst he asks that question our hopes were raised,,  how stupid were we? I really think some more training is required and having read other posts, I don't think we are alone in the way we were treated with the worst thing you can be told, CANCER. Stay strong. X

Stay Strong

9 Sep 2017 16:09 in response to Dor06

Hubby is looking so much better so we book Sunday lunch for next weekend for when our younger daughter comes home, we decided to go to the Shaun the Sheep pub, this is not its real name but our little grandson loves it because it has lots of sheep figurines inside and he's always loved the Shaun the sheep stories!  I text daughter to say booked, she texts back Harry has nits!  He's only been back three days at school.   Hubby shudders at this news and jokingly says don't bother coming,  I point out that we would soon see them on his head because he still has no hair.  I'm off to see nephew tomorrow before he goes on holiday but it's not looking good as they are off to Disney world and all the states connecting which may no longer be there by next weekend.   8 sessions to go, this is flying by, however we don't get any information until many weeks after the finish as it carries on working it's magic.  Stay strong all of you. Xx

Stay Strong

10 Sep 2017 18:11 in response to Dor06

Hubby has a bath and I check him for burns, but there are none,  the vaseline is working, we assume that as he only has nine sessions to go that we may get through radiotherapy relatively unscathed.  Hope is a pure thing and has kept us going through all the traumas over the past six months.   People seem amazed at how we are coping but in reality we really haven't had amy other choice, sink or swim, it's as easy as that.  Knowing he is fineI I set off to see my nephew and his Mum to see how the house is coming along.  No sign of nephew just a Mum and Dad on their hands and knees trying to decide where the floor tiles are going., he had forgotten to tell them he was playing in a pro am golf tournament this morning, they have been left with the debris!  It looks like a bomb site and is no where near finished but young people being full of enthusiasm they have invited friends to stay the first week of October! ! Well I say, you have to look on the bright side!!  I make my excuses and leave them to it. 

Stay Strong

12 Sep 2017 17:01 in response to Dor06

Monday was a lovely day, I arranged for a friend and me to have lunch, our nails done for her holiday (another one abandoning me for sunnier climes!).  I check that hubby is OK with this,  he says fine as he is getting collected earlier and earlier by the voluntary drivers as there are so many people with cancer travelling to James Cook that they end up going all around the county!   We decide it's a day out for him and meeting new people,  they have all been going so long now that they have a communal table whilst waiting for treatment!   I'm not quite sure what we are going to do with ourselves from next Thursday when the treatments finish, I can't quite believe I have written that!  FINISHED.   My friend and I have lunch and a laugh, which is the best medicine.  Home to cook tea and hear the latest tales from the dark side.   Roll on Friday,  daughter home and staying longer than intended, bliss.

Stay Strong

13 Sep 2017 22:08 in response to Dor06

Hubby is feeling better and looking to the future, free of hospital appointments, blood tests , toxic infusions and being targeted by radiotherapy.   He has even planned to try and get his buggy out before it snows!  It's great to see a light at the end of the tunnel.   March seems a long time ago, the diagnosis,  the shock to both of us, my tears in private and his anger at being told he had smoking related cancer. Our family have been marvellous,  friends there when we needed them, kindnesses from strangers and hospital staff who care.  I have looked back at some postings I have made and our progress has been amazing.   I only hope that the end results will give us our lives back for some time to come, but I know this is not the end of cancer for us, but it's a good start. Stay strong my fellow friends. X

Stay Strong

14 Sep 2017 18:58 in response to Dor06

This radiotherapy is kicking in in the last week of treatment.   Hubby has a nasty cough, pulled stomach muscles and a sore throat.  He can now have paracetamol  but it is so long since he had any that they get stuck in his oesophagus and slowly melt causing terrible indigestion.   Our daughter comes home on Saturday and I have been bragging about how well he looks, a miracle is needed in the next twenty four hours!  I pick my friend up and we go shopping to Teesside Park,have lunch a good catch up and an invite to her hubby's 70th.  When did we all become so old?  I call in at M & S for something special for tea, spot the gorgeous red roses and buy her some, but I haven't done anything she says surprised, you have been there for me I tell her and your support has been unwavering.  Thank you God for good friends.xx

Stay Strong

17 Sep 2017 16:47 in response to Dor06

My daughter calls from the car Friday night, the traffic is atrocious and they finally arrive in Wakefield at 10.30 pm, Harry has been a star and I have been on tenterhooks all night.  Hubby is struggling with acid reflux and I am worried he will not be well enough to enjoy the company.  Up early Saturday and they arrive by 10.00 am.  Hubby is not in a good place and niggles about everything to me whilst trying to be happy.  All our plans go out the windows so we go out without him again.  We have a boisterous six year old boy to entertain! !  Indoor play park,   miniature golf where my daughter and I fall about laughing at Daddy trying SO HARD to win and making a complete mess of it,  men are so competitive.   Off to trampoline and rope swing indoor play, where we adjourn to the bar and have a catchup on Dad's health. Back home for tea, arguments over vegetables,  Grandma siding with Harry as he is only little,  black looks from daughter! well isn't that what Grandma is for, rule breaking.  Harry is left with me as Mummy and daddy are booked into  Redworth for their anniversary.   Bedtime story, an Aliens eaten my teacher.   Hugs and kisses and then feet up and new Scandinavian noir series.  All is well, apart from the Cancer hanging over us like a black cloud.  See you tomorrow. Xx

Stay Strong

18 Sep 2017 18:34 in response to Dor06

It's 7.30 am and a little knock on my bedroom door, Grandma is it past zero zero seven o'clock?  Daddy says not to disturb  you til then, he scrambles into bed with me and plonks his pyjama covered legs over mine and his blonde head under my nose, I do so hope Mummy managed to get rid of the nits from last week!!  He plays a game called Swampy on his I pad whilst I doze, but he's  a little chatter box and has to explain all the levels of play to me.  I give up and make a cup of tea for Grandad, he seems a little better today.   Sister in law arrives, the anniversary couple arrive, not happy with hotel, the crowd in last night seemed a little, dare we Say it, common!!  Turns out it's  sister in law's Company thst were there that night with a free bar, slight embarrassing pause from son in law!, Off to Sunday lunch, lots of vodka for me, hubby insists as he feels I deserve a drink, not going to disagree, even have Panacotta with raspberries and vodka, don't want to mix my drinks!,  Harry and Daddy set off for Surrey, we drive home, cup of tea,newspapers and more wine for daughter and me,  love these girls of mine, they are such fun.  Family arrive safely, we have an early night and hubby seems a little better.  Three more sessions to go. 

Stay Strong

19 Sep 2017 17:22 in response to Dor06

Well there are just the three of us now,  daughter keeps giving Daddy lots of hugs and listens avidly to his tales of people he is meeting whilst having the treatment.   There is one person he has taken an instant dislike to, he keeps telling all and sundry about his private parts and in front of women, hubby is old school, ladies are to be respected! I have been hearing these stories for weeks so I escape and read the paper.  We leave him for his treatment and we go shopping, our favourite Mother daughter  hobby.   Lunch in M & S, Mum's treat, off to find boots for her, find them straight away,  wow we both say, that was easy, yep too easy they only have two right feet!  We hang around whilst they seek the two left boots to no avail, give up,  will order on line she says.  We call in the food hall and buy Indian food for two, hubby having soup as still suffering indigestion badly.  Feet up, food wine and the Corrie wedding, we will miss her dearly when she goes tomorrow. 

Stay Strong

20 Sep 2017 17:53 in response to Dor06

Today is a BIG DAY!!  No more treatment or appointments until the end of October,  what will we do without the daily intrusion of chemo and radiotherapy.   I have arranged to have lunch with a friend and a cinema visit to watch Victoria and Abdul.  The movie was lovely, nothing complicated which is great as my mind can't seem to cope with convuluted stories at the moment.  Home in time for hubby to return and put the flags out that for this year at least we have a few months to ourselves.   We must stay upbeat and assume the best, so we will try not to think too much until our next appointment.   So friends I am signing off as there will be little to report until we know which road we will be going down in the future.  I have enjoyed writing these posts, they have helped me cope and clear my head.   It has been good to look back and see how far we have come since March and I hope and pray that you are all staying strong the best that you can.  Love to you all, Carol