Prostrate cancer

Hi first time posting here basically my dad has prostrate cancer he was under watchful waiting by hospital but was struggling to walk after doctors involvement turns out my dad has slipped through the net and as a result the cancer has spread and he now has a spinal cord compression which is why he has been unable to walk they also discovered lung cancer but only 1 nodule which I've been told is good. The doctor told me he has maybe 12 months he's 87years old he celebrated his 65th wedding anniversary last week I've noticed he's losing a lot of weight he is still chatty he also has a grade 4 bedsore which looks awful. My mum doesn't seem to realise how ill he is he's saying to my mum he wants me and my friend to lift him up and get him walking but I'm looking at him and there's no way he could walk he's lost all muscle. It's really upsetting me and I feel bad my mum has said he will surprise you all and walk it feels like I'm giving up on him I'm not at all I just see the reality of what's happening and it's breaking me. We lost my sister 5 years ago I don't think my parents got over that now I have to face this. I've just finished a very messy divorce during which my children have cut me out their lives. And my parents haven't seen their grandchildren for over 12 years through my ex I just don't know what to expect for him what will happen and will he be in pain. Sorry if I'm a bit long winded I started about my dad and opened a can of worms if anyone else has experienced prostrate cancer I'd love know what to expect thanks in advance 

  • Hi mortice 

    I've been living with prostate cancer non curable since February 2016) I'm so sorry about your father mine is in lymph nodes, spine, ribs, pelvis and a lung, I'm afraid i don't know about spinal compression sounds like there's that much C in the bone the bones are is collapsing have they said anything about treatment, sorry if I'm not much help,,.. Billy 

  • Hi Billy thanks for replying so sorry to hear what your going through. The spinal cord compression is a tumour on his spine that compresses spinal cord he has had a dose of radiotherapy but they said he will only get 1 dose he's bedridden and has carers 4 times a day he is unable to use a bed pan and has to just empty his bowels it's heartbreaking seeing my dad struggling like this but I'm proud of the way he's coped. I don't think I could cope as good. The annoying thing is he slipped through the net on check uos they cancelled an appointment and when he rang to get a new one they said they would be in touch they never did and this is result. Prior to this he was very active. I just don't want him to be in pain and I wonder how long he's got I feel bad thinking that but I see the physical side failing it's hard but thank you for replying it does help 

  • That's OK I like to try to help others I'm still surprised there's not more treatment options for your father,, they can't leave him laying like that for 12 months, best wishes.... Billy 

  • I know I'm surprised they can't do More he's 87 years old he had to sign a dnr form I think his age and the other cancers maybe affect doctors decesions I'm no expert but I seem to think his age is a big factor 

  • Sorry I thought that but didn't want to sound rotten about age, are you always up this late... Billy 

  • Hi yes I always stay up late get up at 7 am I'm still working spending most of my time in hospitals but just sharing how you feel and what your going through definitely helps 

  • There's not much of an answer to that I'd rather keep away from them, i spend most of my time looking after my disabled wife she needs 24 /7 care, I'm sorting carer out for when I can't manage it takes forever they reckon there's a queue so it's a long wait, hope you're well in yourself you sound it best wishes.. Billy