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Is this still cancer chat site ?

2 Mar 2019 16:31

when i first came on this site I was just been told my mother bowel cancer  had spread and there was nothing they could do. I was all over place I didn’t know why I came on here really I’m glad In way that I did because I felt I wasn’t the only 1 who was going through this terrible situation. I have made friends and still keep in touch Away from here . I don’t come on here so much now the reason 4 that I feel like it’s getting like Facebook I read post on here that nothing 2 do with the site . I thought this was 4 people who’s going through cancer etc . People like me and many others on here going through different things. The nurses on here only can give advice they can’t diagnose u  what u right on here if u worried about lumps etc go 2 u gp . I hope I haven said anything out of the way . If I have this post not ment 2 I’m just asking questions x 

Is this still cancer chat site ?

2 Mar 2019 17:03 in response to Gemini39

I think there is room for everyone. When you are being told you have to go through an MRI, Pet Scan or you are sent through an urgent referral to a specialist because there is a weird lump in your neck/breast... you get anxious, reaally anxious. Usually here users tend to calm these people about how unlikely cancer is but make sure they get an appointment and get things checked, because unfortunately there is people out there afraid of going to the gp.

Fortunately most of referrals, lumps, blood in stools, smears, etc. posts have a happy ending, but not every time is like that. There are stories here of people who came because "there is nothing to worry really" and ended up having cancer.

I also think that even if people are told they don't have cancer, they leave this chat knowing something about a world no one wants to join.

Is this still cancer chat site ?

2 Mar 2019 17:32 in response to lemonice
Thanks 4 u replay I can see u point but I do think people do 4 get what this site all about . I seen photos on here about moles the nurses can’t tell what is it only advise them 2 have it check out . How do u know if these post on her are genuine i know it’s risk we take . Thanks again

Is this still cancer chat site ?

2 Mar 2019 20:17 in response to Gemini39

I can understand your thinking to some extent, however can I answer your point about photos of moles. Sadly, people who have a worrying mole try to get reassurance from places like this because they feel that presenting to a GP with 'just a worrying mole ' will be wasting a GP's time. It's difficult to get the word out there that it's not wasting a doctor's time and that, by prevaricating, they may be delaying a diagnosis and treatment thereby putting their lives at risk. At least when people put their photos of moles on here they are starting to understand that checking their skin is important. And yes, they are genuine. Having corresponded with them and having gone through the same worries myself many times, I know they are genuine in their concern about their dodgy mole.

Angie (melanoma patient)

Is this still cancer chat site ?

2 Mar 2019 22:46 in response to Gemini39

How sad ... I've been looking at your old posts, and on some you were asking about tablets .. yet you say people on here should phone their G P .. I'm confused ..

I think this is the most wonderful place that welcomes all, no matter what their questions .. everyone is welcome .. it is nothing like Facebook . . I'm sure you could find other cancer chat rooms that you'd be more at home with .. the nurses and moderaters do an amazing job .. I for one am very proud of everyone on here .. no mater what they come on for ..

Chrissie  .....

Is this still cancer chat site ?

3 Mar 2019 06:15 in response to Chriss

What sad about it u mention tablets yes I asked nurse advice that what they there 4 yes they all do great job . I haven said anything out of the way . With the tablets my mother had bowel cancer and she was in pain I had advice and it helped me . I said the nurses can’t diagnose u over photo or what u write on her they only can give advice. I said u should go 2 gp with any lumps etc that why I asked is this still cancer site chat it must be me I must got my wires crossed what this site all about thanks 4 u reply 

Is this still cancer chat site ?

3 Mar 2019 06:16 in response to AngieT

Thanks 4 taken time 2 answer hope u ok take care x 

Is this still cancer chat site ?

3 Mar 2019 09:02 in response to Gemini39

I wouldnt say it’s like Facebook here...and not sure why anyone would post up a pic of a mole and not be genuine. After having had a mole scare myself and speaking to others here about theirs, I can understand why people come here to try and calm their anxiety...and so they should. As stated above - there is room for everyone here. I think it’s a fantastic site and I appreciate that it is so accessible in that anyone touched (or who has the potential to be touched) by cancer can have a space on here to find support. If there is anything that isn’t appropriate (for example, photos, sales messages, anything that looks more appropriate for Facebook and spam messages) - the moderators do not hang around. They really do a fab job on here to maintain a wonderful site/environment. 

In one respect, I do understand where you’re coming from because I have a general fear when using online forums - that I may not speaking to someone who is genuine. I.E someone who says they’re hours from death but who has been logging in their account since, for several days (they must have a very sad/lonely/unbearable life to lie about cancer but I find it hard to have compassion in these circumstances).....when I used another forum straight after I lost my Mum, this person convinced all of us she was in a bad way...we all just accepted everything she said. Not one of us thought she could lying about cancer but she was. We were notified that she was a fraud (some people had ever given her money)...she went to great lengths to create this story and we all felt terrible for her and her son. She came out with some right stories including going to the hospice and staying with someone who was alone and dying with the same cancer as her (she asked us for a prayer circle and kept this story going for a few days!) Also she messaged everyone when she was hours from dying herself (one of the giveaways was....her “friend” then notified the forum under a separate account that she had died and we were all gutted.....but....the person making up the stories was still logging in to her account obsessively several days after her own death...not posting but if you’re friends with someone you can see when they last logged on). It was a shock when we found out she wasn’t genuine (many of us had lost loved ones to cancer or had cancer). So...I am alert to it now and....it’s just a risk we take when we contribute to online forums...there may not be some genuine people here but that applies to anywhere you go on the internet. You can be anyone you want on the internet. 

(It takes a very sick mind to make something like cancer up. Why anyone would want to wish it on themselves or lie about it...I have no idea) X

Is this still cancer chat site ?

3 Mar 2019 09:27 in response to starcatone

Thank u so much in replying and sharing u experience with me . There is some sick people around in it I totally agree. Hope u ok and I love u post about u rescue cat take care thanks again x