Hi Butterfly,

Sorry I've not seen this post until just now.

Really sorry to hear about how this is affecting you at the moment. are there any particular symptoms that you're struggling with? I don't think that you need to see your GP unless you're having symptoms that are causing a lot of issues. Also I want to start by saying that your very young to worry about cancer (we know it does occur in younger people but not that often)

When you have your colonoscopy, one thing that they will be looking for is polyps, these are growths that occur in your bowel (no one knows why but we know that over many many years, some of them can turn in to cancers). Sometimes these polyps are flat against the bowel wall and sometimes they grown on stalks (a bit like broccoli), I don't know whether this helps explain what you can feel.

Endoscopes generally have a width diameter of around 1cm, which varies by model, so even if people do have narrowed areas of the bowel, the endoscopist will generally still be able to get past.

Hope this helps

Hi 

thank you for your reply. It's mainly the abdominal pains and 24/7 nausea that's bothering me ... and the constant dull ache up inside my bum. But if I'm honest it's the dark thoughts that I can't shake , had a panic attack during the night last night, not had one for many years, because this mass is absolutely huge and so can only be one thing. I've already googled polyps an hemorroids and have seen pictures of what they look like and this is neither of those things :( worst of all its all bumpy and jagged like that of a cancer. I have convinced myself that this is what it is before I've even had the test ! :( I'm just a wreck :( my sons had a really tough year and now all I can picture is me being diagnosed and him  not having me around, he just wouldn't cope ! I know I sound silly but this mass is huge and 100% not a hemorroid or polyp. So in my mind there's nothing else it could be :( I'm just so so scared :( thank you for the reassurance about the colonscope . Fingers crossed for Tuesday eh! Hope you are doing ok! 

Oh dear, I'm sorry to hear that this is affecting you so badly, with a young family I'm really not surprised. It's really easy for me to tell you to try not to worry about it too much until your colonoscopy but realistically, I know that's impossible.

I've linked some information about panic attacks and what you can do to help here, I hope that there's something useful there you can use.

If your abdominal pain and nausea are causing you a lot of problems at the moment, your GP may be able to help you in the short term while you are waiting for your colonoscopy.

I would caution against going too much by what you can feel for a couple of reasons. 1, because you don't have the training and experience to interpret the results of a rectal examination and 2, because even when a Doctor or Nurse performs a rectal examination, all they can really say is that there is or isn't anything there. You will get so much more information from your colonoscopy. 
Thanks for asking how I am too, despite all that you're dealing with at the moment. I'm fortunate enough to be healthy and have a couple of days off work, so I really couldn't be better!

Hope the above helps a little.

Hi @Butterfly1987 - I can feel how worried you are - I am older (57) and my children are teenagers but i have the same thoughts about leaving them as my mum died when I was 13.  You must be in pieces - but when you visited the consultant, did he not do a rectal examination as [@Rich03]‍  mentions above?Was he a gastroenterologist?

I am not sure even with private medicine you will get seen any sooner?  I am now on the 2 week suspected cancer pathway with the NHS I've had confirmation, bearing in mind first of all they said 9th March I am really pleased to have the chance of being seen in 2 weeks!  My symptoms are very similar to yours but I am not bendy enough to try to "feel".  

I know its going to be a long week for you - when you say a week have you got an actual appointment next week? Thank god for this forum eh. 

Thank you so much for your reply. I just wish this wasn't happening.... all day I've felt so ill and scared. I am 32 with a lovely little boy and all I keep thinking is I've got this awful disease and how will I ever cope :( anyway, don't really know the purpose of my reply but had to have a little vent! Lol! Can I ask in your experience what do rectal cancers look like? The mass inside my rectum is huge and all jagged and bumpy, spongey, but also firm at the same time......

Hi Butterfly,

Bowel cancers will generally appear very polyp like (because they grow from polyps), but there will be features that your endoscopist will be looking for. These can vary quite a lot so it would be a little excessive to type it all here.

It's common practice (and good practice I think) that the endoscopy staff will discuss your findings with you before you leave, including if they find something that's suspicious for cancer. So take a friend or relative along with you. They probably won't be allowed on the unit but will be able to sit with you if your Doctor doesn't want to discuss your results.

I know you can feel something there which makes it even harder to stop thinking about. It sounds like you have a very supportive partner to share your concerns with so if you haven't already you should discuss your feelings with them and of course there are people here too who are happy to talk, especially if it it does turn out to be bad news (but like I say, I don't think that's the most likely outcome).

Best wishes

For anyone reading this thread many months later as I am, it's worth going here for a more recent post.

Unfortunately this thread was never updated with the reassuring outcome.

Hi butterfly, 

Can i ask did you feel this large mass quite high up when pushing to have bowels open? Ive also been having lots of trouble but feel like GP dont take it seriously when young im only 30.

Hi Rainbow5 and welcome to the forum.

I noticed you were trying to get in touch with Butterfly1987 so I just wanted to let you know they haven't been on the forum since April so there is a chance you may not hear back from them.

I really do hope they are able to come back to answer your question but if you don't get a response within the next day or so it may be worth joining in on some other more recent discussions about this or you can create your own.

Kind regards,

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Thank you i may do that.