hi 

i am new to this forum but feel I just need to talk as I am struggling my sister was diagnosed with a salivary gland tumour in Dec 2015 it was also in some lymph nodes as she was being measured for the dreaded mask for radiotherapy they found more so treatment was delayed while she had more surgery. 

When the radiotherapy and chemo was coming to an  end she was poorly but was ok she was having regular monthly checks and all was well in Dec 2016 she started to have a cough as did most people in the uk but after 3 lots of antibiotics dr decided an x-ray was needed this was clear 24 and we kind of breathed a sigh it was then decided that a ct scan would be better 

I still remember the day we were given the news it was back it was horrid it was at 5 in the evening there was no Macmillan support and the doctor was useless we managed to get into see the oncologist a week later that was a long week .

He told us it could not be cured but he would try to control it so he organised radiotherapy for the main tumour success it shrank no appointments for 3 month yeah a mini victory.

this was 10 weeks ago the pain has steadily increased over this time so gp kept on increasing pain relief about 10 days ago she started to limp and more breathless GP decided x rays were needed. 

Yesterday we had a phone call from the dr asking us to go in as they had her results I was expecting to be told it had spread to her bones but no we now have more tumours and fluid in her lungs and I feel distraught my sister is only 45 am hoping she can have chemo but was so upset as she was upset and said look at me I dying my heart breaks how will I live without her 

as well this my mum has terminal malignant melanoma I just feel so scared and alone am trying to be brave around her but inside I want to scream  I dread the future 

thanks for listening buffy479