Hi it's hard isn't it. I've got cancer and my husband is in bits, it helps me stay strong and to keep positive. Please communicate your feelings to your wife it really does help to talk about everything good and bad. Take care
I'm feeling the same waiting for my partner's results. I can only imagine what she is thinking. As the biopsy was today it might be the longest week or 2 of my life before results are issued.
My blood pressure is up, heart palpitations & unable to sleep is how I am at the moment & worse case scenario is running through my head. This is probably the most scared I've ever been. I haven't let her see how it's affecting me. I imagine it is far worse for her.
The fear of a thing is always worse than the thing itself.
No matter the results of your wife's tests, worrying and flapping will not make them any different; it'll only make you feel bad and possibly become ill yourself.
Best, I think, to think about and deal with them as and when they occur. Be sufficient to the moment. That way, you better serve both your wife and yourself.
Hi , im hoping you are coping abit better now, and yes the fear is great as Taff stated the thing it self. But i understand as you say if your feeling this way, its the shock etc, and you are proberly right for her it will be worse, as it is happening to her, so you have to be strong for her until you get the results, easier said than done , and as my daughter said to me when you get results we will deal with and go from there, as if the out come is bad, nothing is going to change that so if your going to live in fear every day then thats not living to fight the fight, i know its proberly not what you want to hear, but once my daughter said this to me, i realised how right she was. Hope the results are not as bad as you and your wife think. Barbara
Sorry to disagree but 'being strong' is as wasted as fear, I feel. I say, if you feel like crying, or saying 'I'm scared of losing you' or laughing or taking the mick, then you're sharing feelings/emotions and being close. Saying things that matter, in the moment, rather than some ill-defined 'being strong'.
Well we got the results today & a cervical squamous cell carcinoma has been found. It's obviously the worst outcome we could expect. We have no idea what happens next so obviously have to wait for more tests.
I am sorry to hear, this, give your wife all the comfort she needs if she wants to cry, talk etc , just be there , by her side,and until further tests are done, to see what they can do for her it may not be as bad as you fear.I myself have an appointment at the hospital on monday to see the specialist, but im fulled with dread and cant seem to stop crying myself as my symtoms seem to be getting worse each day and im still waiting to have my biospy done as the doctor could not do it, so now another delay. Keep in touch and take care. Barbara
Sorry if my saying be strong you felt was wrong, i did not mean that in the way you think , of course naturally all the thinks you say should and will happen, as has been for me, my partner has been a tower of strenght the last couple of weeks for me by listening to my fears, etc, my crying about my children and has held me as my fear is great, and thats what i meant by being strong, Barbara
The hospital staff have been excellent & it's good that everything is happening quickly. Hoping to get a response tomorrow which would make 3 days from finding something unexpected to an actual plan of action.
We have been a little better this afternoon & started telling relevant people including her new employer. They have been great so far but she is still in probation so we have no idea if they will hold her job or let her go. We'll be dealing with that next week though.
Still haven't told our son yet but we will as soon as we know what is happening.
Overall we're talking to each other & coping well. Just hoping when we get the results it doesn't all come crashing down.
