Hi there dawn...

So sorry you've had to join our groop of breast lasses ... but it's a great place to vent .. ask questions .. and most importantly know your not alone ... 

There are lots of us on here .. and one lass found out she was expecting as her treatment ended and just had a georgious little boy ... so always keep positive stories in your mind ..

Yes it's like the scariest rollercoaster you've ever been on ... but look around wer all on there with you ...l had a grade 3 and masectomy in July 2017 ... and I think the scariest time is where you are now... the wait .. the unknown .. but get all those feelings out ... scream / cry and cuss at cancer ... but you know cancer wants us to lay down , give up , and not fight .. so once you get feelings out , you get yourself some vertual pink boxing gloves on and join us all in the ring ready to kick it's ***.... 

There's a lass on here who's been through what you may come across .. @Marlyn  ... she's amazing and an inspiration to lots on here .. I'm sure if she picks this up, she'll pop by ...

Sending you a vertual hug.... Chrissie  

Hey

welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. My situation is similar to yours, grade 3 bc, my lump is a lot larger than yours. In my lymph nodes but not anywhere else. I am 43 with two boys ages 7 and 10.  My treatment plan is chemo, mastectomy, radiotherapy, then hormone treatment. 

Its terrifying isn’t it going through all the scans and tests and not knowing what they are going to say. I can say it does get easier once you know everything and your treatment plan is in place. 

I have just had cycle 5 of 6 chemo cycles so when you are ready I can share my experiences. It’s totally doable. At my last oncology appt they couldn’t find the lump so I need to have another scan to see it’s size, I share that because it shows that the chemo is working. 

Hair loss , I would suggest getting a wig appointment if that’s the route you think you will go and they can match it to your current hair.  I had my head shaved as I didn’t want to see it fall out, and got a human hair wig made as my boys didn’t want me to look different.

If you have any questions please ask away, let us know how you get on with your plan.

WL

Hi woollylamb

I hope your keeping safe and well. I was just reading the post and noticed you said that your lump was bigger than 3cm. Could I ask the size? Ive just been diagnosed with grade 2 bc but my lump is very big so very worried. Thanks. Sara

Hello , I am new on this chat and have no idea if I am doing this right nor whether I will be able to see if I have replied to the right post? I am 12 weeks post op from a lumpectomy .... it was 3.6cms grade 2 .... I am waiting for my oncology apt next week . I am struggling to cope with daily life and feel very overwhelmed at the slightest thing ! I don't need chemo despite being a high score of 20 . I need to speak to fellow suffers as my friends and family don't understand how I feel and think I am ok and I am not ! 

Hi. It worked you replied perfectly. Sorry your feeling that way, I'm exactly the same. 

I'm at the beginning of my diagnosis and my lump is very large (they couldnt measure it via mammogram or ultrasound!) so terrified is no where near how I feel. I have a MRI scan on monday (25th) with surgeon appointment on Thursday. Every time I open my eyes in the morning the sadness just hits me. My husband is doing his best but every time I try talk to him about my fears he just shuts me off and tells me to be positive. I want to be strong for him and my family but inside I'm an absolute mess. 

Sorry, like I said I'm at the beginning of this so I'm not sure what happens when, what is the oncology appointment for? Is this what is worrying you the most 

Omg I know exactly how you feel ..... it's the very first thing I think of too when I open my eyes and the last thing at night .... very overwhelming ! 4weejs after my op a friend told me to press the rest button .... it's not like I was dying .... things like that ! I was mortified ..... because of covid I haven't seen her thankfully ..... I am angry this has happened to me and she made it worse ! It wasn't her intention I am sure but it was an awful thing to say !!! So I too went for a MRI .... I promise I am not trying to scare you but I wasn't warned what it was like .... it's very noisy and goes on a long time and you must stay super still ! I just kept hoping it would stop but the machine would start up again and carry on going .... you must have it done tho as it's the best way to check size of lump ! Your surgeon will then discuss whether they can remove the lump (lumpectomy) or whether they have to take the breast . Do you know yet if it's in your lymph nodes ? Within a month they should operate ! Please feel free to message me as I feel I have been through hell and am still in it ! So oncology of next steps .... you go either to chemo one or radiotherapy one . I am going radiotherapy so give out Monday how much I need and also future mammograms etc . Keep it touch if it helps .....  I have been suffering alone and the other night my husband said why aren't you sleeping .... I couldn't belive he had to ask !!! Mad me angry so I understand what you mean ! It's hard to talk to anyone about it as they don't understand as it's not them going through it ! Feel free to message and ask me anything you want . 

Hi. Thank you for explaining things, im all over the place really so the information helps. Yeah our husbands sound the same. It's odd, in a way I want him to act normal and not be scared to say things around me but when he does I feel so much anger. Your friend shouldn't have said that, but I'll be honest if I was the friend I wouldnt have a clue what to say and panic and end up probably coming out with something not appropriate. They said a lymph node looks suspicious on ultrasound but the fine needle biopsy was negative but they didnt seem that confident with that result so sending me for a core biopsy. To make matters worst I'm feeling all sorts of pain everywhere! I know from the size of i that it can only be really bad but thank you for the heads up with the MRI, I feel better knowing what to expect. Please keep in touch and feel free to rent anytime! 

I felt all over the place .... still do if I am honest ! It's very lonely having cancer ! They took my first few lymph nodes as they do tests on them ( my op was an hour and three quarters ) they take a fair amount of tissue around the lump too to ensure they get it all .... how old are you ?(if you don't mind me asking ?) I am 51. Did they say why your getting pain everywhere ? Def good to have the mri it's the best way to see everything but my surgeon said the only real way is when they go in for sure . It's all very scarey and time drags too .... I hung on to every word they said and did everything they told me too as i wanted / want the best outcome . I wanted answers straight away but it doesn't happen like that ! 

I've only told them about my leg pain which I've had since December but they just keep telling me, "it's all about the now" at this stage. I feel if I tell them more they'll just think its stress related and continue with the "it's all about the now". I am angry allot, most at myself, why on earth did I now see this sooner! Wouldnt mind but I was only at the breast clinic 18 months ago and it was clear. I do want answers, if I dont get them then my mind makes them up, I've always been like this so now slowing myself down is really difficult. Thanks again for sharing, it does help. 

If you were only at the clinic 18 months ago isn't that a good thing then .... if it wasn't there then wherever it is now is less than 18mnths old ? If that makes sense ? Mine was a routine mammogram as I turned 50 .... it was then delayed for 7 months due to covid so when I had mammogram end of September it was big ! 3.6cms! I couldn't feel my lump as it was furrther back in the breast tissue and I am a DD .... how did they / you find yours ? Don't be angry at yourself .... it's not your fault ! Feel it's a bit of a lottery ! I have lived a healthy life ... never smoked , never taken drugs , always eaten healthy ..... walk every single day .... hardly ever have a drink ! Breast fed by two babies ( now teenagers) statistically I shouldn't have had it .... sometimes these things are beyond our control . I get why you make up your own answers up .. it's so hard and your mind plays tricks on you ! I write things down as I am told them or repeat them out loud if my husband is in the room just so later I can say ' they did say that right?' As I wonder sometimes if I make things up as when things don't happen when they said it would or the outcome isn't what they said I doubt myself and wonder if I am going mad !!!! I wouldn't worry how many times you tell them about other issues and I was told something similar .... I was told this problem is bigger so it gets our attention ( or words to that effect) but no harm in pursuing if something is bothering you ! They need to look after you .... all of you !!!! The other issues ( pains all over ) could be a sign of something that could help diagnose what's going on for them ? I don't know ... I am not medical I am not saying that's the case obviously  .... but just feel you need to mention it .... again and again then at least it's on your notes ??  Are you working ? I find the only time I get away from my own mind is when I go to work as it's so busy I haven't got a second .... since new lockdown I am working from home .... not the same as I have time to think ! I can't get out my own head !!!! I wish I could switch it off sometimes just to have a break . That's why it's nice to talk to you ! Even tho I am further down the line I remember exactly how you feel as it's all still very fresh ! The not knowing !!!!! Eats you up !!!!