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Advanced stage 4Bowel cancer

28 Jan 2023 06:23

In April last year my partner of 12 .1/2 years was diagnosed with Advanced stage 4Bowel cancer. She had metastasis to her liver.15 weeks after diagnosis she was admitted to hospital with sepsis and a malignant bowel blockage. After receiving an operation to remove the blockage and have a stoma fitted she told me the relationship was over. We were so close ,i went through those first 15 weeks supported her and told her every day as i had for over 12years that i loved her so mucj and we would get through this together. She has cut me off completely, i hear she had another bowel blockage and has had 4 cycles of chemotherapy. A liver resection was performed in October to remove a large tumor ,she lost over half her liver. Unfortunately when she returned to hospital after Christmas for a consultation about the primary tumor in her bowel she was told the cancer has spread to her womb. Im absolutely in a mess,im so concerned, worried and confused as to what is going on and why she ended our relationship so abruptly, quite literally over night.But more than anything im desperate to know what the future holds for her ie her prognosis. Also i need to try and plan a future for me and the children bt she has closed me out.I absolutely adore,and admire this woman bt feel so upset,confused and angry. 

Advanced stage 4Bowel cancer

30 Jan 2023 10:29 in response to Jebb

Hi Jebb,

Welcome to Cancer Chat. I'm so sorry to hear of your situation - this sounds incredibly difficult and I can completely understand it must be hurtful and worrying and lots more besides.

It's hard to understand the reasons for her decision, and people going through treatment can have emotional reactions that can be difficult for those around them. It may be an effort to try to protect you, although I'm sure it would be having the opposite effect. I'm not sure if you are still speaking to each other, but either way it may help to write her a letter to explain how you feel  and that you'd at least like to be able to understand what is going on with regards to the prognosis.

If you feel you'd like some support in dealing with your situation, it may be helpful to have a look at Macmillan - and they also have a helpline.

Hopefully you'll also receive some more replies here soon, and I hope that the forum can be helpful for you.

Wishing you all the best,

Cancer Chat Moderator