Read article Your feelings and anal cancer
This page is about some of the feelings you may have when you have anal cancer.
Your feelings and anal cancer
Most people feel shocked and upset when they first find out they have cancer. You may feel numb, frightened and uncertain, confused, angry, resentful or guilty. Or you may feel totally different. Everyone reacts in their own way. Sometimes it is hard to take in the fact that you have cancer at all.
Upsetting feelings are a natural part of coming to terms with cancer. Your family and friends will probably have strong feelings too. Remember, you don’t have to sort everything out at once.
Talking to others
Most people feel embarrassed talking about cancer of the anus at first. Our bowels, and going to the toilet, are very private matters. It is up to you who you tell. You may find it easier to talk once you have got over your initial shock.
Getting support
Your doctor or specialist nurse can put you in touch with specialist help if you need it. These people are there to help and want you to feel supported. So use them if you feel you need to. Counselling can help some people, and you can ask your doctor or nurse about local support groups. It may help to be in touch with someone who has been through what you are going through now.
You can view and print the quick guides for all the pages in the living with anal cancer section.
Most people feel shocked and upset when they first find out that they have anal cancer. You may also feel
- Numb
- Frightened and uncertain
- Confused
- Angry and resentful
- Guilty
You may have some or all of these feelings. Or you may feel totally different. Everyone reacts in their own way. Sometimes it is hard to take in the fact that you have cancer at all.
Upsetting feelings are a natural part of coming to terms with anal cancer. All sorts of feelings are likely to come and go. Your family and friends will probably have strong feelings too. Remember that you do not have to sort everything out at once. It may take some time to deal with each issue.
You may feel quite isolated and find it difficult to talk to people. It is not unusual to feel quite embarrassed about having cancer of the anus at first. Our bowels, and going to the toilet, are very private matters for many people. It is up to you who you tell, and who you decide to talk to. And you may find it easier to talk about things once you have got over your initial shock.
Do ask for help if you need it. It is likely that your doctor or specialist nurse will know who you can contact to get some extra support. They can put you in touch with people specially trained in supporting people with cancer. These people are there to help and want you to feel supported. So do use them if you feel you need to.
You can also look at the bowel cancer organisations page for organisations that can put you in touch with a support group. Some of the counselling organisations can help you find a local counsellor or other sources of emotional support in your area.
There are also web based forums for exchanging experiences, such as Cancer Chat - Cancer Research UK's online discussion forum. It may help to be in touch with someone who has been through what you are going through now. Getting support from other people not only gives you comfort, but can help with practical tips and ideas too.
The coping with cancer section contains lots of information you may find helpful. There are sections on
- Your feelings
- Talking to people: who and what to tell
- Talking to children
- How you can help yourself
- Who else can help you
- Sex and sexuality
- Financial support, including information about benefits and sick pay
- Mortgages, pensions, loans and insurance, including travel insurance
If you would like more information about coping with anal cancer contact our cancer information nurse team. They will be happy to help.
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