Changes in your appearance due to salivary gland cancer
Surgery for salivary gland cancer may change the way you look. These changes can affect you in different ways.
It can be upsetting at first. Some people find that they have intense feelings including grief, fear and anger.
Changes to how you look might also affect your self confidence and body image. But there are lots of things you can do to help you cope with them.
Possible changes in how you look
Surgery that involves your jaw, face or mouth may change the way you look. The changes in your appearance depend on the type of surgery you have. Your surgeon and specialist nurse will explain what will happen before you have your surgery and how you will look afterwards.
You usually have scarring after surgery but even with big operations, you might not have a great deal of scarring. Many scars fade over time and are not so easy to see. Your surgeons do all they can to position any scars in the creases you already have on your face.
Nerve weakness
Rarely, people have a permanent weakness of the nerve that controls the movement of their face on the side they have had surgery. This nerve controls the closing of your eye, wrinkling of your nose and moving your lips. It can mean your facial expression doesn’t change in the same way as it did.
How surgery might affect your self esteem
How you look is an important part of your self esteem. It can be very hard to accept sudden changes in your looks. It's not unusual for people who've had surgery to their face to feel very angry, confused and upset for some time after their operation.
Going back to work, meeting new people or going to job interviews can all be difficult if you are trying to cope with changes to your appearance.
You might feel worried about how your friends and family see you. Or about being physically attractive to your partner. If you have children, you might worry about how their friends will see you and if that will affect your children.
It is natural to worry about this but remember people close to you will not think of you differently as a person. They will want to support you as much as they can, so let them know how you are feeling. Talking to them might make you feel more supported and less isolated.
What you can do
There are lots of things you can try to help you cope with changes in your looks. These might not take away all the difficult emotions but can make things easier.
Talk to your surgeon before surgery
This is probably one of the most important things you can do, even if you feel at the time that you don't want to know. It can help you cope with changes to your appearance later on if you know exactly what they are going to do, and how you will look. You will be very sore and swollen straight after surgery but this is temporary and is not how you will look forever.
Ask as many questions as you need to. Your surgeon and nurse specialist will be aware of how worried you are about possible changes in your appearance.
Talk to someone who has had a similar experience
Your surgeon or specialist nurse might be able to put you in touch with someone who has had a similar operation. Some people find this reassuring and informative. This is not the case for everyone. So don't feel like you have to do this.
Look at yourself in the mirror
Your first reaction after surgery might be to avoid looking at yourself in the mirror. This is normal and it's completely up to you when you look at yourself. It might be worth waiting a little while after the operation until you feel awake and alert and you have recovered a bit.
Having a nurse with you the first time you look can be helpful. Even if you have thought about how you might look, it can still be a shock. Your face might be swollen and numb. You may also have to deal with seeing stitches and changes to the structure of your face. Having someone to answer your questions can be supportive.
Your feelings
Many people feel angry at first. You might feel that your doctor and specialist nurse have not prepared you for how you will look. It can feel hard to imagine that you will feel a little better as time goes on and the bruising and swelling improves.
Your family and friends may not know what to say to you. They won't want to make you anxious or upset. You may prefer to bring up the subject and let them know how you are feeling. It is a good idea to keep regularly looking at your face in the mirror.
Use camouflage make up
Camouflage make up can be very useful to cover scars or skin grafts that are different colours. There are lots of colours for all skin tones. There are some specially trained skin camouflage experts that work in the NHS. Ask your doctor or nurse if you have this in your hospital.
An organisation called Changing Faces can give you information about using camouflage make up. They can teach you how to apply it and tell you about the best products to buy.
Getting the make up
You can buy some camouflage make up over the pharmacy counter or direct from the supplier. Others you might be able to get on prescription from your GP. This isn’t guaranteed though. Your GP can tell you what might be available on prescription.
Getting help and support
Not everyone feels comfortable asking for outside help and support, but many people find it very useful. There are a number of organisations and support groups that help people cope with changes in physical appearance. These include:
- Changing Faces – helps people cope with any form of facial disfigurement
- Let’s Face It – links people to resources that can help them cope better with facial disfigurements
- Mouth Cancer Foundation – supports people affected by head and neck cancer
